Friday, April 14, 2017

Paint Job

I had been in a rut the last while - I froze. And not just from the not-so-fabulous weather we had been having this last while. Funky health in March, too much going on generally all around, and not taking a step back to sit, think, ponder and evaluate - and just giving myself a bit of a break - overwhelmed me and I froze. My writing along with many other things took a hit. Too many fingers in too many pots? Maybe. Very likely, actually. But I realized I was expecting too much from myself - I was pushing myself beyond what I could handle - and that along with many external forces that were zapping me of all creativity had me knowing I had to stop. My creativity seriously left the building and honestly, I don't think I really wanted it back.

But I was lying to myself. I didn't want it gone, I just needed a break. But inch by inch I'm coming back. I had to change - had to re-asses and re-evaluate what I'm doing, where I'm going, and how I'm gonna get there.

But getting there would have to be on my own terms.

So as I'm slowly coming back - and not to what I once was, but as a newer fresher version of the old writing-me, I had to have a make-over. A paint job. Part of the reason for my frozen state was that I was stale. Yes, I had burned out on so many levels of my writing and my creativity, but I was also very stale. Very outdated. It was time for a change. The old is not totally gone and never forgotten. I'm thankful for what I've had in the past - it's help make me the ME I am now. But I just had to figure that out on my own, first. It's time to move on and keep moving forward, with renewed energy, a bit of a fresh look, and the knowledge that it's okay to give myself a break once in a while. Most of us loves a new set of clothes, rearranging the furniture, new hair or nail polish - a new look. I'm still the same me, but just a slightly different version of ME. I had to acknowledge what got me in a rut in the first place, and reinvent myself a titch and go forward - without fully leaving the old me.

Get it?

Anyways, here is a bit of a new me. We're always evolving - always changing - and this won't be the last change I make. Sometimes less is more - not so bulky and overwhelming. It's up to us to shed what holds us down and get ourselves out of that rut we can sometimes find ourselves in. It's okay to get in that rut, but it's how we get out of it that matters.

And a new coat of a paint can never hurt....

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