Sunday, July 14, 2013

Plight of the Corn Cob Holder

You know how it is.....

It’s summer. The barbeque has long-since cooled down, the ice has melted in the now-empty cooler, and the sun has finally set. Those last few much-needed ‘special’ drinks have worn off, you’re bleary-eyed and tired, maybe a little bit sunburnt, and you just wanna go to bed.
But you’ve got a kitchen to clean; plates to scrape and wash and leftovers to be put in the fridge.


It’s the morning after a barbeque-turned-all-night party. Fizzy drinks from the night before are taking their toll on your body and mind. Your mind, tongue and eyes are not fizzy anymore, but fuzzy. But you have a kitchen to clean, and all those dirty dishes need to be scraped and soaked.

In either scenario, you want to – have to – get things cleaned and put away. From somewhere deep inside you get your second, third or fourth wind, and you’re suddenly frantic to get it all done.

And in your cleaning furry, you throw out some the most important items of summer. They’re small, seemingly insignificant, and easily missed in the piles of yellow corn cobs and napkins. Corn cob holders.

Some call them ‘skewers,’ and that’s fine, but this is my story, so I’m calling them ‘holders.’

In this part of the world, we typically use them during two months of the year. The average Canadian household associates corn on the cob with summer, the only time of year it can be grown in abundance. The only time of year we can really use the cute little plastic commodities.

Sure if you really, really want, you can have corn on the cob year round – if you are willing to pay, say, $10.00 for two ears of corn imported from lands afar. Pre-husked and cello-wrapped on a Styrofoam tray, they are often found nestled with the ‘exotic’ vegetables in the produce section.

But when you can get 6 ears of locally-grown corn on the cob for $2.00 during a Canadian summer, you’ll be passing by the über-expensive corn on the cob and heading to the frozen food section. But frozen corn, already off the cob, is definitely not the same. And the corn cob holders remain idle, if you still have them, that is.

So during the rest of the year, if your corn cob holders have survived the massive post-barbeque clean-up from the summer, they sit in your drawer, untouched, unloved, and often used, abused and cursed at.

If you’re like me, you prefer the corn cob holders with metal prongs. I don’t know about you, but I don’t see the point of the ones that look like a big plastic drill. Those corn cobs are hard in the middle, and when fresh out of the pot or barbeque, they’re too hot to try to screw in a plastic corn cob holder. So the metal-pronged ones are best – trust me.

In the back of the utensil drawer they stay, forgotten and unloved, until one day when you’re rummaging around in the drawer and AACK! One of the sharp points stabs you under your fingernail.

Hmm....maybe the metal pronged ones aren’t a good idea, after all, you say.

Actually, they’re a very good idea - good for a many great things. When not impaling corn cobs two months out of the year, they’re good for:

• Popping unpopped balloons (unless you want to sit on them, which is always fun)
• Digging out a piece of uncooked spaghetti that has fallen down the crack between the stove and the counter
• Picking out dried-up Play-dough from various nooks and crannies
• Picking out garlic from a garlic press
• Assisting in decorating Jack O’Lanterns (that pumpkin skin is VERY tough)
• Picking corn out of teeth (although not the safest thing to do – and not the most polite)

And the list goes on....

In my ever-constant quest for finding out more, I discovered corn cob holders that nest inside each other, thereby eliminating the wretched stabbing-under-the-finger nails bit. There are everything from dinosaur corn cob holders, to über-classy rosewood holders for the more posh than I (although eating corn on the cob is not the most ‘poshest’ of dining experiences, anyways).
All this is what I thought about as I sat there one summer evening watching my family all but inhale a few cobs of the summer treat. I fiddled with the holders resting on my plate after fulfilling their intended use, and pondered the little plastic gems. Even the most tiniest, insignificant things have their use; never under-estimate the power of ‘little.’

And hold on to those corn cob holders – you never know when you might need them.

Oh...and don’t forget the dental floss.

(Hmmm....maybe I should try this...)

No comments:

Post a Comment